So, I have been feeling a lot better about money in the new year. I told myself that I did not want to go thru that level of stress and worry about money that I did last year. And, what I did differently this year, was that I bought a good amount of food at the beginning of the month so that even if I was broke, I would not be without food, nor having to eat super unhealthy things. I am also doing better at eating what I have at home, and trying to avoid my cravings to buy food and drink outside.
I paid off a large bill last year, and this year I will have another large bill paid off, which will let me have more disposalbe cash--or really, cash i can put towards improving my diet and to put towards my savings. I have been working really hard at a very good job, and yet, because of bad money management, I am not fully able to enjoy the fruit of my labors because so much of my income goes to paying off debt.
I am dealing with where I am in my life right now, and where I want to be. I am also meeting more people from long ago who make me feel a bit more behind than i really am---they seem super professional and successful and they are starting families and all of that. And, well, as for me, I am feeling a bit stuck. I am worried about getting married, getting the home that I want, having kids, being a happy mom making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, etc. I know that if I look at where I have come from, most people from my background would have had multiple kids by now, very little education, etc. I am blessed to have had the opportunities that I have and the experiences that I have had. But when I see other people like me who went on a different path, and yet still are happy and raising kids, etc., it makes me wonder a lot. Did I work too much? Did I not focus on myself--on being the person I need to be, while focusing on making money (that was useful, but eventually spent).
I have been feeling a bit conflicted about this and just trying to sort everything out. I had an experience this weekend where I got to see something like a dream home. I didn't know who the owners were, but I imagined them to be rich. The place was so relaxing and inviting, though a bit sparse. It made me have something to look forward to in my life. I worry about being able to make that dream come true, ya know?
Money and my perspectives
January 11th, 2010 at 05:04 am
January 11th, 2010 at 04:37 pm 1263227861
I say this only because I'm learning to do this myself and I'm 54 years old. Don't fall into the trap I did.
You are an exceptional person and you deserve to take joy now, with or without the house, hubby and kids.
Take care.
January 11th, 2010 at 05:50 pm 1263232206
Thank you so much for your kind words! They mean a lot to me.
You are a very kind person, and I really appreciate your words. You remind me a lot of a relative that I have who is very kind and helpful and understands that even though I am a grown woman in her 30s, I am still developing and maturing. I hope that is normal! Ha!
January 11th, 2010 at 10:14 pm 1263248097
Remember that things are seldom what they seem. The owners of the dream house might not be rich, not really able to afford it and keeping up a front. It could well be that they are spending many sleepless nights in the dream bedroom and would be envious of a person who has their finances under control.
January 12th, 2010 at 01:52 am 1263261158
And we are always developing. Life is not static, and neither is personal growth. I'm 54 and still growing as a person.
And I know that you are one of the special ones, who appreciates what she has, and actually thinks about things instead of just going with the crowd. That is exceptional.