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Asking for Help

October 28th, 2009 at 09:56 pm

So, I had some unexpected expenses this week---I needed extra gas and that messed up my plans for my budget until pay day. It sort of sucks because I hate feeling like I am scrambling for money.

I also feel bad because I like to keep food in my refrigerator for snacking or just regular meals and for today there is just enough left overs for dinner for my bf, but nothing to take for lunch the next day, and no time to defrost the meat I have in the freezer, as I thought the food would last a bit longer.

I will cook again tomorrow, and that should last a couple of days at least. I am, as usual, kicking myself for not planning the month out better. I should have set aside more money for general necessities so that while I wouldn't have money for excess things, I wouldn't be going through this whole weird breakfast and lunch combinations that are not the healthiest for me.

I am almost filled with glee when I think about shopping for things like toilet paper and paper towels and deodorant. Joy!! I am also seriously going to buy a lot of pantry staples so that even when money is short, I will always have a good food option available. AND, I am going to set a bit of my food money aside to keep for Thanksgiving! Smile

My bf has been helping me more, and I really appreciate that. It has been hard for me to ask for help at times, because I worry about how it may be affecting him. I need to stop doing that, and just allow him to help me when he offers.

I spoke with the customer service rep for the account that is automatically debited per month. They seem a lot more helpful with trying to correct the issue than the customer service reps that do the automatic calling. I owe them less than $20, and they have been calling me day and night! Now don't get me wrong, $20 is a good amount and it is the principal of the matter, I understand, but why call me at 8am on the weekend? Why call me just a few minutes before 9pm at night? Sigh. My friends say I should just pay the balance (the correct balance, of course), and just be done with them. I am seriously leaning towards that.

I need to take better care of myself. I see how people age when they are stressed or work too hard and don't eat the best foods, and I worry about that for myself. I did that whole Real Age thing, and well, it put me at least 10 years older than my chronological age. Not good. Frown

I hope that everyone is doing good and I thank you and appreciate all of the advice you all have given me. Smile

2 Responses to “Asking for Help”

  1. fern Says:

    Years ago, i dated someone, an attorney, who had moved back up to CT from Miami to take care of his ill parents. The move wasn't initially meant to be permanent, so he moved back in with his parents and took the room he had when he was a child. He was an only child, and would be a wealthy man since he would be the sole heir. (We were both in our 40s then.)

    John worked at a law firm, but it wasn't a salaried position and so he wasn't making great money, but then, he didn't have many living expenses. He really detested the practice of law actually, and lacked the drive to find a better job. I got the idea he was just "coasting."

    We were together a few years. Every weekend he'd come up to visit me and stay the entire weekend. In hindsight, i realized this arrangement worked perfectly for him becus he needed to get out from under his parents' roof and he had a very poor relationship with his mother, which ultimately affected my relationship with him as well.

    But anyway, becus i was "in love," I happily cooked and cared for him. Sometimes we'd eat out, but I'd always cook at least a few meals for him. He always praised my cooking, and so that just encouraged me to plan nice meals and make his favorite things. Basically, I spoiled him. I basically put him up 2 out of every 7 days of the week, and the cost of the groceries, began to wear on be noticeable and it was only when i started asking him to help out, and he resisted, that his true self emerged. I had always known that he was kind of cheap, but i didn't expect that he'd try to be that way with me!

    I had always thought we were very compatible and effortlessly enjoyed our time together, altho now I wonder how much of that was due to J.'s cozy situation. Just a word of warning.

  2. north georgia gal Says:

    I too am excited about buying bath soap and such. I am finding great deals on it so I am stocked for when money is short! I also stock up on laundry soap and cereal. Canned goods are a good thing too, as they don't go bad very quickly. Those meals in a box are a good option as well, especially for only 2 people. You can find them on sale for under $3 and they keep for a while too.

    On the other issue...my DH and are having problems because he doesn't help financially. He expects me to take care of everything, even when I have asked for help. He wasn't always that way, but grew into it because I was trying to take care of everything when we first married. Now he doesn't help at all, even when I ask for it. So just keep an eye out.

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