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The Luxury of food

March 1st, 2010 at 07:37 pm

With the part-time job, and help from my ex, and being solo, and cutting out many types of more expensive food, I find myself having the luxury of buying food that is so much healthier!

I found myself strolling down the supermarket aisles yesterday in a euphoric fog. I wasn't able to go crazy and buy all organic, but I was able to buy food in varieties I just can't find at my neighborhood stores.

Part of me gets upset that when I go to the budget supermarket (where I was thisclose to buying their meat because it was cheap--even though everyone warned me not to) and there are so many people and families (lots of families---more families, I feel, than what I saw at the nicer store)who have to shop there, they don't have the selection of healthy foods. Rather, they have rotting produce and at times its price isn't cheaper than other places.

I realize that yes, healthy, diet-specific food is a luxury for me now. I also feel like people should have access to these wonderful foods that come from the earth rather than having to spend their dollars on a higher caloric, but unhealthier, food option. We really need to change the food availability in our country and around the world. Yes, I am one of those people who is disappointed when they travel somewhere, and see the usual fast-food logo beckoning new consumers. Sigh.

I also find that I have been putting more effort into me. That means my clothes, my hair, etc. It is a good feeling.

Not sure about my relationship. He is still very kind to me, but we haven't talked much or spent much time together. Sometimes I get sadder in the evening, or when driving, but I try to just not think about it, or cry it out and focus on other stuff.

I have been trying to just smile and keep my head up in other areas. It is frustrating because I worked so hard at being friendly and nice, and I still see others getting preferential treatment. It is hard because I know that so much of it really isn't about ability, but more about friendship and relationships and things that should not be a factor, but are. Sigh.

My goal for this month is to NOT use my credit cards like I have been doing. I want to start rebuilding up my available credit on one of my cards so that if I ever did really need to use it, I would have that available credit, well, available. I do not like that I have had to use it for basics like food and gas. Not cool.

I want to thank everyone who takes the time to read my thoughts. Now, because I am solo, and how things are in other areas that I am, I often don't really have many people to talk to. I feel like I can express my thoughts on here, and I get so much good advice and understanding, and I really appreciate that. Smile

6 Responses to “The Luxury of food”

  1. paulettegoddard Says:

    The last three paragraphs of your post resonate strongly within me. Connections can be difficult, and frustrating when you know you're doing the right things by smiling, saying kind thoughts, and wondering why they aren't reciprocated.

    I'm happy you're treating yourself well: love yourself, let it show and others will love you too.

  2. baselle Says:

    One success at a time - good healthy whole food will help you to feel better, which means you will think better, be in a better mood and look better. Concentrate on that for a few weeks. Smile

  3. whitestripe Says:

    i realised long ago that even if it seems like people have their crap together, and their life seems peachy compared to mine, there is usually one aspect or more, that you dont notice, that they are stressed about and trying to change. Once i realised that it became easier to forgive myself for the things that my life might appear to fall short on.

  4. pjmama Says:

    Like Whitestripe said, even the people that seem the most together always have *something* to stress about. You just have to stay positive and work toward your goals.

    Using the CC for essentials really is not cool. I had to do that for a while, and I'm still paying for it...

    Final note, I've found that when you finally are flying solo that it is nice to give so much attention to yourself. It baffles me how little I do this within my own relationship even now (and it's something that I'm consciously working on!) Enjoy it. And enjoy your healthy food as well. Food is a category that I also tend to allow myself to float into the "luxury" realm with... and it really is just that. As you mentioned, when there are people all over the world-- and just in our country-- that cant afford the healthier options, it really opens your eyes.

  5. Joanne Says:

    Just a thought on yr. blog...I enjoy yr. blog.. I think you are really honest, & open w/ yr. thoughts. As others have said...I think that everyone has self-doubts @ times, they might just not show it . I also think that everyone feels lonely @ times, & when it happens it can be painful. You seem to be a hard worker, and can take pride in that...and, that you are willing to be so opewn to others,,,That can be a risk...someone may not be nice back. That may be more their issue though. Don't know if you have family around, but sometimes not having a close family can be painful...Wishing you the best...

  6. miz pat Says:

    I have not been following the blog as much as i like because hyper busy at work, but today i see you, dear lady, and the first thing i notice is that boyfriend is now ex? Aiiiii! I have voodoo doll ready to use if necessary. Just let me know.

    On the other hand, you sound a little less stressed and that's a good thing.

    Sometimes its hard to find someone who you can honestly call a peer. I have friends who care about me, but we don't like all the same things. Sometimes I feel alone, although now i feel more complete about myself.

    I am trying hard not to define myself by relationship (divorced/single/married). And I'm trying to not define myself by money or lack thereof.

    I like that you have more money for better quality food. Take care !!! Blessings

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