I know that I have been sounding kind of funky lately in my entries(and not in the George Clinton sense), and I am sorry if anyone has been a bit bummed out by them. I am not always in this kind of mood, just lately, it seems.

I am looking at trying to be as resourceful as possible, buying things that are only absolutely necessary, and trying to make more time for me. I also find that blogging and journaling help immensely...there is the fact that on a daily basis, while I have a lot of friends and some family and a loving boyfriend, I don't really have people I can talk to about things I see or encounter on a daily basis. I just don't want them to fear talking to me for fear that it will just be wah wah wah, so I don't call them as often as I should.

I have been thinking of my finances, and while it is true that I don't have a decent emergency savings, and have a good amount of debt, it is also true that my 401k is almost back at the level it was before the recession (yay!!!), my bills are slowly, but surely being paid off, with two large bills being paid off within a year. Yay!! I have a roof over my head, some nice clothes I can always hand wash or dry clean to keep them in shape, and my car, which takes very good care of me (love you girlie!!), and even though I may have a big appetite, I am nowhere near starving.

Some goals I have for myself (finances wise) is to get my emergency savings up to at least $10,000-$12,000 (about 3-4 months of expenses). If I had a year's worth of living expenses, I would probably do cartwheels, I kidd you not.

I really want to learn how to play in the stock market....I have always wanted to know how to read the investment figures and whatnot, but never learned. I would really like to learn how to read that. The most I do now is listen to financial shows and keep an eye on the dow, and routinely check my 401k. My investment level is moderately aggressive, so maybe I should go up one level as I have about 30 more years before nearing retirement age.

I also want to own a home by age 40. I know that means I will have to get my credit rating super duper high, and try and get over $25,000 in savings.

I know someone who has a home, and she is always this negative kind of vibe (you guys think I am negative, HA!) no matter what the topic...it seems like nothing makes her happy, there is no joy in anything, even spending time with family, or owning her own home. I don't want to be like that. If I owned my own home, I would want to have trees or lots of foliage and greens and I would want to try and at least be able to grow some kind of veggie or fruit, ya know?

I want to visit some Asian and Latino countries in my life time. I want to view more of our country and how people live. I want to have the joy of taking a train in another country, or flying across the atlantic (?) to visit lands far away. I can't explain how much, to me, going to a country such as China or Japan, would help to sort of undue a lot of the negative stuff growing up.....it is hard to explain what I would feel, but it would be a very cathartic and healing process I think.

I want to thank everyone for all of their support and encouragement. Things seem better between me and my bf. I think that maybe what I said just needed to be said? I am also being more understanding that there are some aspects of the family situation that are more stressful than maybe I am admitting, and I am being mindful of that.